THE OH-SO-SUBTLE SOUTHERNIZATION OF A YANKEE…

Those sneaky southerners! They draw you into their gracious mannerly ways and hypnotize you with that charming long-voweled speech. Before you even realize it, you've been Southernized. I’m a born and raised Buckeye, a Yankee through and through. But most of my thirty years as a Navy spouse have been spent in the south. Virginia, South Carolina and Tennessee, to be specific. When I ran across a porch plaque defining The South, I realized I just might be one of them now. 

 

The South

\t͟hə ‘sau’th\, noun

A Place Where…

 

Tea is sweet and accents are sweeter. I’ve been known to slip a “fixin’ to” in as often as possible—and it must be said with a twang in order to truly be southern.

 

Summer starts in April. Which in my advancing years I do prefer over the frigid weather up north.

 

Macaroni and cheese is a vegetable. So, I think, are shrimp and grits. If you had told me twenty years ago these “southern vegetables” would become a necessary part of my meal planning, I would have told you that you were goofed on skunkweed!

 

Front porches are wide and words are looooonnnngg. I grew up without a front porch but have come to appreciate the lazy summer days sitting on my porch, surrounded by colorful hydrangeas and wrapped in the scents of citrusy magnolia blossoms and sweet Ligustrum blooms. It’s soooooo soothing and rebalances my outlook on life. I wave to my neighbors—and their dogs (mostly their dogs) as they stroll by on their way to or from the beach. I hold a glass of icy sweet tea (or wine…mostly wine) in my hand and sip to my heart’s content. Shoes off, feet up, maybe Alabama playing in the background (see how sneaky they are? I'm forsaking my Cleveland Rocks musical preferences for blues jams and boogie licks!) Life does not get better than that.

 

Pecan pie is a staple. I still prefer mine half-pecan and half-pumpkin…proof you can take the girl out of Ohio but you can’t take Ohio out of the girl!

 

Y’all is the only proper noun. And the plural “all y’all” rolls delightfully of the tongue. Try it, you’ll see.

 

Chicken is fried and biscuits come with gravy. Southern fried chicken is a culinary talent I have yet to master, but I have developed a discernable palate and can distinguish between “fried” and “southern fried!”  

 

Everything is Darlin’. And everyone is “Honey” or “Honey Chile” and every dog is “Sweetie” or “Sweetie Pie.” No proper names here. Makes it easy as my memory fades and I can’t remember someone’s name.

 

Someone’s heart is always being blessed. I always thought it was a lovely, sweet sentiment. But my true southern friends recently let me in on a little secret…it’s a “passive-catty” (another southern expression I’ve embraced) way of dissing someone, but in a most genteel way. The best explanation comes from Chloe’s Blog: “You can say anything about anybody, then say, ‘Bless her heart,’ and it is alright. “She certainly has fleshed up – she looks like a bale of hay – bless her heart.” Bless your heart gives us southerners carte blanche to say something not so nice about folks, and then be forgiven immediately.” <<source: Bless Your Heart - Southern speak and other sayings (bigmill.com)>>  

 

It was that last one, about my southern friends letting me in on their little secret, that I realized I had been Southernized without even knowing it.

Even my front porch is now southern!

Wishing all y’all a happy 4^th of July weekend, preferable spent eating fried chicken and chillin’ on your front porch!